So glad I don't date anymore

I don't know how you guys do it. I don't even know how I did it back then, for that matter.

So glad I don't date anymore
Source: UnDraw

I'm writing this from the coffee shop where I usually wait for Jazmín to finish with her patients, sitting in the back, immediately regretting coming to this part of the shop instead of the drier and hotter one I returned from exactly because of those conditions.

Why? Well, what I thought at first a normal grown up couple being lovey-dovey – first flag– was actually the couple's first date. I don't know about you, but I don't know any couple –parent couples, or around forties– that continue to be so over each other that you find them cheesy and extremely ridiculous. And I say that with the understanding that Jazmín and I are super lovey-dovey, cheesy and extremely ridiculous, but we're in our early 30's... Anyways, I should've known.

After hearing their conversation for about 2 seconds, I'm caught up with what was going on. It's really not so hard to get a grasp of the situation when she says "I've been talking about myself for a long time, tell me something about you." Well, that's how things normally go, I guess? But then, he says "I live in El Paso... Actually, I have to be there in a couple of hours, so..." and here it comes, the fucking awkward silence. I've been here for only a couple of minutes –I shit you not, I have not even placed my order– and I already know this shit's done. Kudos to the guy. I know it takes courage to be a straight shooter like that, but fuuuck. The look on the lady was heart breaking.

She recovered, though, and now, knowing for sure there's nothing in the future for this date, decided to start ordering stuff like crazy. Good strategy, I would've done the same myself. Obviously, nothing is going to happen next, but that doesn't mean she can't at least get a couple hot beverages and a handful of desserts as a palette cleanser, and if he doesn't pay for it I'm pretty sure she can afford it anyway, so... Lose-lose? I'd be hard pressed to call it win-win haha.

The Lenovo Duet 3 Chromebook, a latte and a mango pie.

So, dating sucks...

I don't think it only sucks for people over forty. To be honest, I think it has always sucked, but when you're younger you're more willing to take the risk and take several leaps of faith because at the end of the day you're not risking much other than getting kicked straight in the heart. Once you get older, you start recognizing patterns of behavior, you start identifying the type of person you like and dislike and, overall, I think you're less into wasting time. Well, you're not getting younger...

Now, it's not all bad

When grown up relationships do work, I have the feeling that it's amazing, though, mostly because you're all set up in life and things are easier and there's no parents involved. For the most part, I guess.

Have you heard about skydiving? I think dating is mostly like that. It must be scary seeing how high you are, but once you're feeling the wind and slowly falling into Earth, I bet the view is amazing. There's going to be times when getting in the plane will scare the shit out of you and you won't even consider jumping, but then there will be times when you'll be already falling and you won't even notice because you're so happy.


After this episode of stalker Oscar, I hope there's something to learn –other than not listening to other people's conversation– and that is that dating, while amazing, can also be a heart crushing experience, but, hey, most of the best experiences are. Worst case, you'll end up eating paid-for-desserts.

Until the next one.